The lags should have tried giving back a quarter of the money, apologised profusely and blamed their behaviour on "administrative shortcomings". Well, why not? If it works for MPs, then surely it's worth a try for common or garden crooks?

Picture the scene in the House of Commons on Monday after Tory MP Derek Conway, who was yesterday suspended for 10 days from the chamber, made his lamentable apology for what the Standards and Privileges Committee euphemistically described as "at worst, a serious diversion of public funds". And we know another word for a "serious diversion of public funds", don't we boys and girls?

As the rest of the country recoiled in disgust at the MP's greed, his fellow Conservatives were rushing to congratulate him, slap him on the back and speak up in his defence. If there was ever a graphic illustration of how out of touch with the public mood our dishonourable members have become, this was it.

But the Conservatives were not alone. Labour and Lib Dem MPs were curiously muted in their response to the scandal. Why? Bluntly, because they are all at it. In their eyes, Conway's only crime was to get caught. More than 40 MPs employ family members – paid for by the taxpayer – as "Parliamentary researchers" or such like. Others employ union buddies and personal cronies under various guises – all at your expense.

Who can forget, for example, the exotic hostess Pamela Bordes who managed to get a Commons security pass, and MP Clive Betts who made Brazilian male escort Jose Gasparo his parliamentary assistant?

The total cost to the taxpayer of MPs' expenses, allowances and staffing costs is a whopping £87m a year.

But no one is ever allowed to check if all these "researchers" actually do any work. Conway was only caught out because of complaints by a persistent constituent.

In fact, we can only guess at the scale of the abuse because MPs are extraordinarily secretive about how they spend our money. Speaker Michael Martin recently blocked a request for the names and salaries of MPs' staff to be published.

And last year MPs attempted to circumvent Freedom of Information laws to prevent taxpayers scrutinising their expenses. Now we know why.

What we see here is a prime example of the arrogance of power. MPs make the rules, but feel under no obligation to obey them. Rules, as far as our elected leaders are concerned, are for the little people who are required to pay for it all.

Well, perhaps if there is enough public anger this time around, we'll be able to take them down a peg or three. At the barest minimum, MPs should be obliged to publish a full list of their staff, complete with salaries and bonuses. While they are at it, they should list in detail their expenses and allowances backed up with invoices and receipts that can be inspected by any member of the public.

If they can't be trusted to be honest, we'll just have to put checks in place to make sure they obey the rules. Not that any of this will worry MPs unduly. Once they leave Parliament, they can enjoy the riches of the most lavish pension scheme in Europe.

They voted themselves these riches – at our expense, of course – while presiding over the catastrophic collapse of the once-robust British pension system.

An ill wind...

ISLAMIST extremist Yusuf al-Qaradawi hates the West, thinks the UK is decadent and supports suicide attacks against civilians. So why does he want to visit the UK? It turns out he needs some medical treatment and the evil, decadent West is the best place to get it.

It never ceases to amaze me how these preachers of hate can so easily put aside their supposedly deeply held convictions when it comes to their own comforts.