It came to a head the other day when somebody was spied with four plastic supermarket carriers heaving with freshly-picked brambles. Perhaps first-come first-served should be the law of the autumnal field.

But, for me at least, it's always seemed fair when walking down a footpath flanked by berries to take just enough for a pie or a crumble. Maybe a few extra if the branches are absolutely laden down, but there's always a thought spared for the next forager to come along.

In particular, the farmer's wife is always on my mind – "she won't have had time to get down here, what with harvest..."

Then there are the birds; completely stripping the hedges always seems mean on them.

Perhaps greedy-guts behaviour has been spurred on by the credit crunch, people looking to nature's larder to see them through hard times.

The other thing that annoyed me about the plastic carrier bag looters was that their dog wasn't on a lead. It was in and out of a then still-to-be-cut cornfield, knocking the already depleted crop to the ground.

Tetley, it has to be admitted, has quite a lot in common with the lurcher made famous as Alfred in television's Heartbeat. To put it politely, he looks like a bit of a character. He's always on the lead though – not for fear he wouldn't come back but just as a matter of courtesy. Firstly with regard to crops and other animals such as nesting birds, but secondly because he's so big it wouldn't be funny if somebody was frightened of dogs and they saw him careering towards them. He'd only lick them, but that's not the point. It really annoys me how people wander around smugly with their dogs off leads, laughing in an "isn't-he-adorable?" sort of way when they bound up and make a nuisance of themselves.

It's probably obvious through this week's lack of cheer that we haven't had a bramble pie this year. The windfall apples are sat on the doorstep looking unwanted. There's no enthusiasm for peeling and stewing them without a few brambles to take the tartness away. It's my own fault, there were loads three weeks ago but other jobs prevented me from getting tooled up – old ice-cream tub and a stick for bringing branches down – and picking some.

It seems a waste to do anything with them other than eating, but – and don't try this at home, boiled bramble leaves mixed with lye are said to make a black hair dye.

Maybe that's an idea. A disguise. Black hair rather than red, plus a different dog, and nobody would know it was me hogging all the berries …