When someone goes missing, life is thrown right out of kilter and nothing can assume its normal rhythm; every hour that person is absent hangs heavily. For Jacqui Hoyland, there have been almost four weeks of that dragging weight of time.

Jacqui is nothing if not a realist. She knows the phone could ring with the terrible news she is trying her darndest not to imagine, and she makes a point of saying, twice, that with every passing day she knows the chances of her husband Jeremy being found alive are a little slimmer.

Knowing that everyone she has asked for help is doing their best would make her feel a lot better. But the fact is that, since a few days after Jeremy Hoyland's disappearance in the Indian Ocean on October 24, she and her family feel they've have had precious little help from those best placed to offer it.

She's frustrated and says, rather bitterly, that her family are not important enough for someone somewhere to flick a switch that wouldthrow all the resources of Army, Navy and Air Force plus all the technology 21st century science can offer at the task.

Her 41-year-old husband, an after-sales service manager for a component company, comes from the Pennine village of Penistone and lives for his family and his sport.

"If Gordon Brown went missing at sea, there'd be such a hue and cry and they'd track him down in no time," says Jacqui, a European project manager for a major retailer.

"He stopped serious business to comment about that nonsense over Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand; yet he has not replied to my request for help in finding Jeremy, sent days ago.

"Jeremy is a survivor and I still believe he will be found alive, but time is passing and we seem to be getting no help from those who could really make a difference in searching for him. Jeremy represents his country at sport and is fiercely proud of being British, but where is his country when he needs it?"

The house is far too quiet, says Jacqui. A bristling forest of jet ski trophies are there in the living room. But the absence of his big, opinionated personality and the shock of the current situation have left their home hushed.

Daughters Elenna, 13, and Georgia, 11, have been going to school for part of the day. In between, Jacqui talks to the media, talks to Jeremy's brother over in Bali and racks her brains as to where she can turn next to ask for help. The authorities in Indonesia may have given up, but she and the family see every reason to hope.

When Jacqui met Jeremy 18 years ago at a Young Farmers' event at the local pub, it took him two weeks to move from asking for a first date to proposing marriage in front of all their friends at another Young Farmers' do. Quick-moving Jeremy also liked to ski, and a few years after they married he also took up jet skiing, learning on the lake at Rother Valley Country Park.

He bought his own jet ski and a VW camper for the family to travel with him, and, within three years was taking part in serious racing events. As Jeremy began to win and climb the rankings, up to 16 members of the family would go along and to support him. Determined, tough and a very safe skiier who had never suffered a serious injury in 13 years, no-one was surprised when Jeremy Hoyland became British champion.

"He is very active in the sport all year round, and really wants to promote it and improve its status, hopefully seeing it in the Olympics one day," says Jacqui. "He's also passionate about making the sport more affordable and accessible, not just an activity for people with money."

In the last three years, Jeremy Hoyland became race director for the Jet Ski Racing Association of Great Britain, organising events all over the UK. He also joined the board of the International Jet Sport Boating Association. He was thrilled when he heard that the Asian Beach Games, held in Bali in October, was to be the first official games that included jet skiing.

He travelled as a race official to the World Championships in Arizona at the end of September, then on to Bali for the Asian Beach Games, starting on October 19. "It was the longest he'd ever been away from home," say Jacqui. "He rang every day, and said how much he missed us. He's a real family man."

On Friday, October 24, Jeremy and other race official colleagues had some hours free before a race later in the day. Jeremy was concerned about an endurance race the next day, which involved riders crossing to Nusa Lembongan, an island 15 miles away, circling the island, and returning to Bali. He and the others set out to test the exact distance and time across the choppy channel, making time along the way for
snorkelling.

When the party set off back to Bali, riding a swell of 10-15 feet, they hadn't gone far when Jeremy noticed that his colleague Bob Crabtree was having difficulties some distance behind him. He dropped back to help, while the others sped on. Fifteen minutes after the rest of the party safely landed, Bob arrived and said he had not seen Jeremy.

"My understanding of events is that the others were sure Jeremy would turn up in time for the start of the afternoon's race at 4pm, but he didn't arrive," says Jacqui. "He had his phone and tried to get through to Peter, a colleague on the beach, but failed. So he rang Jet Shed, the company in Sheffield who supply jet skis and parts. He knew they had Peter's number.

"He told them he was in trouble about two miles away from Bali and two miles south of where he had been. He couldn't see land, or he would have swum, as he's a very strong swimmer. His jet-ski wouldn't sink, as the hull is filled with foam, so he would stay with it. He had red and yellow flags for emergency use, and was lying in the water with the flags outstretched."

At around 4.30pm, a sea and air rescue helicopter was sent out from Bali, but Jacqui thinks this crucial first search was carried out in the wrong area.

In total, Jeremy made eight phone calls in the hour-and-a-half after his disappearance, then the phone battery must have given out.

Jacqui was flying back from a business trip to Germany while this drama was unfolding. Two-and-a-half hours after the search had been called off for the night because the helicopter had no lights on it, she heard that her husband was missing.

"I was so upset, and even more upset that he was now going to be 12 hours alone in the water with no-one searching until daylight, but I reckoned that if anyone can survive it's Jeremy. I went and told his parents, Judith and Peter, and his brother, Nicholas. They were devastated.

"I then got ready to go to Bali, and was already travelling to Heathrow when a Foreign Office phone call came to tell me that a report had come through that the Navy were believed to have found Jeremy. It turned out that all that had been found was a big lump of debris."

Jacqui had also contacted South Yorkshire Police, and asked them to request information from Vodaphone on Jeremy's whereabouts when he made the last phone call. In almost a month the information hasn't been forthcoming, she says, even with the help of Sir Richard Branson, who travelled to Bali to talk to local officials and also paid $2,500 for hire of a helicopter. Vodaphone now say they are working with local operators to get hold of
the data.

Jacqui spent 10 days in Bali with Jeremy's brother Nicholas. The Balinese authorities sent helicopters up for five days to comb roughly the same area of around 20 miles diameter, says Jacqui.

"After that, I paid for a helicopter search across a wider area and to leaflet the many small islands and fishing boats, offering a $10,000 reward to anyone who found him. The authorities over there clearly don't have a plan for such situations, and our Foreign Office doesn't have any contingency, either.

"They haven't put me in touch with anyone who can help. There are hundreds of little islands around there, and he could have washed up on any of them. Many of them are covered in jungle,
so he'd probably be okay for food, but it would be quite difficult to see him.

"We need to find people who know how to organise this kind of search, and understand the movements of the ocean to figure out which direction he might have gone in. What we need most urgently is expertise."

Nicholas Hoyland and a friend are still in Bali, conducting searches by boat, and the family here have raised £15,000 so far towards the expenses of the operation.

Jacqui is obviously immensely frustrated that the authorities in Indonesia have done so little to assist someone they invited over to help organise a prestigious event on the island. No-one has taken responsibility, she says, and she has had little contact from the Foreign Office.

"I'd like the Army, Navy and Air Force to get out there and find him, but I know that's not realistic. But there must be someone with the right knowledge to help us.. I want to go back to Bali and find Jeremy, but need a plan and a lot more help first. All the locals say 'the spirits have taken him,' but I don't accept that at all."

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