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Home truths for families forced to play the generation game
If ever there was an advert for the benefits of family life, The Waltons was it.
Whatever minor tragedy befell John Boy or his six other siblings, there was always someone at hand to impart some sensible words of advice, and when night fell, everyone from Grandpa Zeb to Jim Bob went to sleep safe in the knowledge their loved ones were close at hand.
By the time the cameras stopped rolling some quarter
of a century ago, John Boy had flown the nest, but according to new research, the Waltons phenomenon is enjoying something of a resurgence.
Sadly, for most people, it's not through choice.
According to a report by Prudential, more than 80,000 households have three generations living in them as financial pressures force families to move in together. In the future, the number of so-called 3G families looks set to increase as lower retirement incomes leave pensioners unable to afford to live on their own, while high house prices and the problems caused by the credit crunch
are preventing many young people from getting on to the property ladder.
Inevitably, when teenagers, parents and grandparents end up rubbing shoulders day in, day out, it can lead to friction, and the reality is far removed from the idyll of Walton's Mountain.
"It may seem warm and fuzzy, but sometimes it doesn't work out that way," says Mary Pelland, a contributor to the advice website suite101.com.
"In fact, the situation can be fraught with problems with no one in particular to blame.
"There is an increasing likelihood that, at some point, many of us will move in with our children. It can work, but both generations need to honestly consider and talk about serious issues. If there is no meeting of the minds, tension will rule the roost and success will be elusive at best."
Around 10 per cent of adults said they had an elderly parent or relative living with them, while 18 per cent said their grown-up children still lived at home and Macmillan had now included the phrase "extended financial families" in its online English dictionary. Even parents whose children have moved out still find themselves providing financial support, with 11 per cent saying they give their offspring money to help them make ends meet, with a further three
per cent doing the same for elderly relatives.
A small minority find themselves supporting both ends of the spectrum, handing out an average of 126.17 a month to help support their own parents and their children, and the situation looks set to get worse.
Just under three-quarters of all parents are worried their children will be unable to buy a property and will live at home until they can afford a deposit, probably until well into their adult lives.
At the same time, 44 per cent of people have parents or elderly relatives aged over 60 and a fifth have considered asking them to come and live with them. In the next 20 years, the number of extended financial families is predicted to treble to more
than 200,000 by 2024, the equivalent of one in every 25 British households.
"Besides the fundamentally high cost of housing and constantly increasing property prices, British families are under financial strain across the generations," said a spokesman for the Skipton Building Society, whose earlier report also highlighted the trend.
"Working parents have to contend with high childcare costs, so may need to rely on the help of grandparents and relatives. Rising property
prices and student debt force many young adult first-time buyers to stay at home in order to save up a deposit for their own homes.
"Older generations can enjoy an increased life-expectancy, but may need to stay with younger relatives because of pension under-funding or the escalating cost of residential care."
On top of the financial support they provide, in the Prudential research 15 per cent of people said they had adult children or elderly relatives living nearby who they regularly looked after and did chores for.
A fifth of people said they did things for these relatives at least three times a week, with 11 per cent helping them out on a daily basis, carrying out chores such as doing the shopping, washing, cleaning and cooking, as well as offering them lifts.
"The phenomenon of the 3G family does not come without a cost," says Gary Shaughnessy, managing director of Prudential Retail Life & Pensions.
"For the middle generation, the financial drain of providing support for both the younger and older generations could have a detrimental impact on their ability to save adequately for their own retirement.
"In turn, they too may eventually become financially reliant on their children in old age."
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Saturday 26 May 2012
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