Gervase Phinn: A clerical error
I love this rich, poetic, tricky, troublesome, inconsistent language of ours.
Since an early age (on the advice of my brilliant English teacher Kenneth Pike) I have written down words in my notebook which have unusual spellings, ones which I have never come across before and those which simply appeal to me. Here are some of my favourites: hobbledehoy, ragamuffin, brouhaha, autochthonous, esurient, prescience, swashbuckling, dandified, deracinated, troublous, inspissated, propinquity, ptarmigan, viscosity, weasel, pontificate, avuncular, contrapuntal, expostulatory and gewgaws.
Shakespeare was the first recorded user of about 2,000 words. Like the Bard, some people still love to create new words and expressions. There was a wonderful office cleaner who was greatly adept at this. "Mr Phinn," she once said to me, "you're so artificated." On another occasion, she saw a colleague waving at me madly from across the office. "Mr Smith's testiculating," she told me. The Sunday Times conducted a survey to discover what people thought were the most beautiful words in the English language. Here is the top 10: Melody, velvet, gossamer, crystal, autumn, peace, tranquil, twilight, murmur, caress, mellifluous and whisper.
I met Hilary Murphy on a cruise ship. She was on the front row for one of my lectures on English spelling – always a hot potato – and was willing with some of the audience to have a go at a spelling test.
Hilary not only spelled the 30 words correctly but gave me a list of other tricky words. I was amazed by her knowledge and then discovered that it is she who sets the questions for Who Wants to be a Millionaire? I am indebted to Hilary for this list of wonderfully expressive words:
ALEATORY – depending on the throw of the dice
BIBULOUS – addicted to alcohol
BORBORYGMUS – rumbling of gas in the intestine
CICATRIZATION – healed by the forming of a scar
DEFENESTRATION – throwing a person out of a window
ERGOPHOBIA – dread of work
EXCORIATE – peel off, strip, remove skin by abrasion
GALLIMOUFRY – jumble, medley
GLABROUS – bald, completely smooth
GNOMON – the rod of a sundial
PICAYUNE – insignificant thing
or person
STEATOPYGIC – having excess fat on the buttocks
TERATOGENIC – producing monsters
I asked Hilary what was the most memorable moment on that popular quiz show. A contestant, she told me, was asked the question: "The Archbishop of Canterbury is known as a...?"
There were four options: primate, marsupial, mammal and rodent. The contestant opted to go "fifty-fifty" and was given two choices of primate and marsupial. "I'll phone a friend," said the contestant. The friend, yes you have guessed, opted for marsupial.
Whenever I see the warm bearded face of Dr Williams on the television screen I cannot think of him as anything other than "The Marsupial of All England".
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Weather for Yorkshire
Friday 25 May 2012
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