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Road to recovery: Nathan Gillies' blog - signing off
After suffering a rare elbow ligament injury in Belfast last October, former Sheffield Steelers' Canadian forward Nathan Gillies reveals the highs and lows of his bid to get back on the ice, something he has now done in Colorado, USA, with Rocky Mountain Rage in the CHL.
Wednesday, February 18
I promised you all one final update for this season but, unfortunately, I haven't written it from Sheffield.
To be honest with you, my wife and I truly loved it there. We faced one of the toughest decisions a professional athlete and his family ultimately have to make.
I was given the choice' to stay on the bench and help Matty coach the Steelers for the remainder of the season, or search out other options to play the remainder of the year.
I was given a few offers to play for various teams around the Elite League, but my heart remained with the team that I believed would win the league title and I couldn't play for another team in the Elite League because of the bond I had developed with the boys in that room.
My reasons for leaving the UK and coming back to North America were partially due to my loyalty to the Sheffield Steelers organization, but if I could not re-join the Steelers as a player, I wanted to be with a team in North America that may also have a shot at a league title themselves.
I eventually chose to come and play for the Rocky Mountain Rage in the CHL. We are located 20 minutes north of Denver in Colorado and from what I am told it is one of the best places to play in the CHL.
So far, I have only played one game for the Rage and we ended up winning 4-3 in a shootout. It was my new team's first win against Mississippi all year and my arm felt great the entire match. I managed to play like my gritty and tenacious self without even thinking about my former injury.
I believe that this mentality, not to mention all my hard work and training, helped me tally two assists. Considering this was the first game I played in four months, it was a pretty good outcome.
It was a remarkable feeling to be able to battle with the boys again and now after playing, I know in my heart that I made the right decision.
For many people, I know that the safe decision would have been to stay in Sheffield, collect a paycheck, workout, travel, and ultimately win a championship. But, that being said, I would not have been able to look myself in the mirror knowing that I took the easy way out.
Don't get me wrong I would have loved to stay in Sheffield, but I really needed to play the game again. I have worked hard my whole life to get where I am and I intend to continue striving to be the best player and person I can be.
I hope that all the fans can understand and support my wife and I for making this decision. It was truly an honor to be part of the Steelers organization.
It is obvious to see why Steelers are at the top of the Elite League. They are a class act and I wish them all the best for the remainder of the season. I know they will bring the League title back to Sheffield.
I wish I could be have been a part of it because it is something you will never forget. Who knows, maybe someday I will come back
and help another Sheffield team win the League.
One thing is certain, my wife and I will take some unbelievable memories and long-lasting friendships from England with us along our journey. Thank you all for understanding how hard this decision was. We greatly appreciate all your support.
Cheers, Nathan
Tuesday, January 13
Sticking together through the good and the bad
Well, we lost two heartbreaking matches in overtime against two equally desperate and determined opponents.
I know we battled very hard for one another, but it just seems that every team brings their 'A' game because to be the best you have to win against the best.
I know we dropped two points this past weekend, but I believe that the most important thing for our team right now is to stick together when times get tough.
After all we have been on a ridiculous winning streak and we have to learn to battle through some adversity in order to stay on top of the league.
I am confident in our abilities as a team that we will push and work harder through this little 'hiccup'. In the end, we will end up stronger and more united.
As far as my injury is concerned, well, I feel great on the ice but the true question is whether or not I can play the same tenacious and energetic game as I did before I got hurt.
I have been religious about doing my physiotherapy three times a day so I hope all my hard work will pay off.
To be honest, I feel that my arm is strong enough to handle the physio exercises but we have no idea how it is going to handle hitting or fighting.
I guess these questions will have to be answered once I get back into the line-up.
As far as a timeline goes, well I am pretty much still 'week by week' and 'day by day'.
There is really no way to predict whether or not I will be capable of taking an awkward check or an outstretched pass.
Basically, I'm saying that it's hard to give a final analysis or diagnosis of my injury because there are a lot of uncertainties in the game of hockey, let alone sports in general.
I just hope that when the time is right and when I finally return to the ice, I can help the boys win the league title.
With this said, I will be turning my training exercises up a notch in order to be in absolute top physical condition.
Right now it is important to stay focused on my goals and keep a positive frame of mind. After all, attitudes are infectious and I believe that all of us in the Steelers' locker room are in it to win it.
Cheers, Nate.
Saturday, January 3
Passion for game just keeps growing
Well, the New Year has finally arrived and I for one have certainly been looking forward to a fresh start.
Don't get me wrong, it's not that I haven't enjoyed my road to recovery, I just hate sitting on the sidelines while the boys battle it out on the ice.
I get so intense that I have found myself screaming, swearing, and jumping on the bench a lot more then usual. I don't know if this is a sign that I can physically come back, but one thing's for sure, I still have the fire. As the season wears on and the games get harder, my passion for the game continues to grow.
Over the course of the last few weeks we have had some pretty tough games against teams that are looking to catch us in the standings. For the most part we have held everyone back and remain in first, but we still have a lot of work to do.
We actually only had two full days off over Christmas, which sucks, but that is the business of entertainment.
I truly believe that our workout and practice schedule has allowed us to stay at the top of our game and take three out of four points against Nottingham Panthers.
As a team we realize that it's a long season. The most important and exciting games come during the second half, which we are now entering.
Hockey is one of those sports that you have to ride the wave, remain calm, and play consistent each and every game. I am sure that we will continue to train and battle hard for one another because we all want to win, whatever the cost.
I am extremely pleased with our success and the overall performance of the boys. All I can do right now is cheer them on and point out the odd thing that we can do a little differently. Well, that and take care of my end of the bargain, which is staying in shape and being 100 per cent ready for when I get the call.
My physiotherapy exercises continue to get harder each week due to my progress. Right now we are trying to re-teach my elbow how to handle strain, fatigue, and a hard workload.
My physiotherapist Andy recommended push-ups, dips and many different stabilizing exercises in order to exhaust and eventually strengthen the entire elbow. I continue to find difficulty accomplishing some of the balance exercises, but I know there is only one way to get better.
Obviously, I am not 100 per cent right now but I am doing everything in my power to be ready when the time is right.
I have been practicing with the boys for a couple of weeks now and have finally been able to shoot the puck a little. I still experience a bit of pain when I pass and shoot with any force.
To be honest I am getting a little anxious and impatient. All I want to do is step out on that ice, play hockey and have no worries if I can shoot, pass, or handle the puck, let alone take a hit or throw a punch.
I believe the worst thing for any athlete is fear or uncertainty. Both of these make you second-guess your decision-making, which in turn puts you a step behind and usually in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Hockey, like any other sport, relies on split-second decision-making, anticipation, reaction and timing. You can hone these skills with practice, but there is a certain element of luck or chance that comes into play.
No matter which way you decide to look at it 'fear and uncertainty' cannot be in the equation because it only spells disaster.
I would love to be playing hockey again, but I realize that I am not quite ready yet. My best decision would be to keep working hard at my physiotherapy, get stronger, and make sure I'm a rock for the rest of the season.
Cheers, Nate.
Monday, December 22
Putting in the hours
My current status has not changed much from last weeks update, but I have managed to take part in a few more practices. I guess you could say I am getting my ice legs back under me. For those of you who have skated before I am sure you well know how hard it is just getting your balance back.
I have been sidelined for about eight weeks now so it's quite a relief for me to get back out on the ice with the boys. Not only does it make me feel a little more 'part' of the team, but it allows me to share in that special bond.
The last couple of practices we have been focusing on mainly 'flow drills', which are specifically designed to allow us the freedom to skate and take shots on our goalies. During these drills there is almost no contact which is why I can participate.
Lately I feel as though I have a lot of pent up aggression so it is nice to wheel around and blow off some steam. Not only does it give me a sense of freedom, but it allows me to do something I love.
Lately I have been trying to put a little more muscle into my shooting technique. The problem is that my elbow still does not have the stability and strength I use to have. Therefore, I have to rely on my lower body and core technique a lot more when I am shooting.
This is actually a great way to focus on all the little things that lead up to shooting or just getting into the right position in order to take that shot. Overall I feel great on the ice and I am really looking forward to getting back in the line up.
As far as my physiotherapy goes, Andy and I have been stepping the intensity up every week. I have upgraded to a black thera-band for this week and I will hopefully get his approval to go ahead and start lifting some lightweights.
The problem is that I might think I can speed up the process by lifting heavier weights, whereas it is in fact the complete opposite. If I continue to focus on my stabilizer muscles, I might have a better chance of playing hockey sooner. Looks like I will stick to the thera-bands for the time being.
Andy has also given me a few ab ball exercises, dips, and believe it or not some knee push-ups. I am surprised that my elbow can hold and even lift half my weight. I find that when I am doing most of these exercises my elbow fatigues really quickly whereas I could have done double the repetitions before.
Fortunately enough I only have an upper body injury so in between practice and physiotherapy I work my lower body as much as possible.
This past week I ran the stairs at the arena twice, followed by some speed ladder and iron cross exercises. I try to do this workout before practice because it lasts a total of 1 hrs and I am exhausted by the time I am finished.
The days in between my over speed workouts I try to do six or seven exercises on my legs, followed by a 20-minute ab routine and a 30-minute run or bike ride. These are usually pretty tough days so I try to space them out at least three days apart so my muscles have the time to repair themselves.
As you can see I have been extremely busy for the last six weeks and it seems my workload has only increased each week since my injury. To be honest I am extremely thankful to have so many great people working with me during this very difficult recovery period. I really couldn't have done this on my own.
Since this is my last blog of before the festive season I believe a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year are in order. I hope everyone enjoys their time spent with family over the holidays.
All the best, Nate.
Listen to an interview from Dec 20 with Nathan Gillies talking about how his recovery is going and how much he wants to get back to competitive action on the ice by clicking the green PLAY button
Wednesday, December 10
Pulling on the skates again at last.
Wow - what a weekend for the Steelers. We battled hard as a family for 120 minutes to retain our place at the top of the league standings.
I thought our efforts against the Belfast Giants were nearly flawless, whereas our game against Edinburgh, the final score did not really dictate how hard we worked. For some reason we had to fight through some horrible refereeing, but we still managed to capture a four-point weekend.
For those of you that have been following my weekly updates I am sure you all know that I had an appointment with Dr Ali, the elbow specialist. I visited with him last Wednesday (Dec 3) for a brief check up. I guess the reason why it was so short was due to the fact that my elbow has got significantly better over the course of the last seven weeks.
The ultimate goal was to re-establish full range of motion without pain before our next visit. Upon arrival Dr Ali asked a few questions and performed a few tests before he told me 'the elbow seems to be quite stable'.
Somehow during the twisting I felt relatively confident this time.
I really don't know if it was all the physiotherapy Andy had me doing over the last month, or if I was just in the right frame of mind. Either way I left Dr Ali's office that afternoon happier than ever.
Dr Ali said he was 'quite impressed' with how well and quick the ligament has been healing. He mentioned that I could remove the 'bionic arm' brace and start skating in order to stay in shape. But he also stressed to be extremely cautious on and off the ice.
Needless to say once I received the news I called Matty (head coach) right away and told him that I could hang with the team on the ice again. He shared my enthusiasm, but also mentioned that I should take it easy and stick to the game plan – basically meaning I can skate but only in moderation and only during certain drills.
I am not supposed to shoot or pass a puck hard, so basically I join drills that I can just skate through. For me this is very hard to abide by because I only know how to play this game one way, and it is full throttle.
On the other hand I do realize the severity of the injury, so I will play it smart in order to come back in full health for the remainder of the season.
The next day I went to see Andy for some more physiotherapy. Once I informed him of Dr Ali's assessment, Andy decided it would be best to step our training up a bit.
We started out by doing some basic thera-band resistance lifting, followed by a ligament massage. The best way for my arm to heal is by increasing blood flow to the area and then trying to flatten the ligament in a smooth position. Right now my ligament is knotted into a ball where the fibres have overlapped.
Andy stated that this was part of the healing process and the only real way to break it down was to massage it. By doing this my ligament will heal flat and straight. It will also become more durable and flexible so that I can take and give hits again.
I realize that we are still taking baby steps, but we have to make sure that everything within the actual elbow has not only healed properly, but is in full working order.
Once we have taken care of all the working mechanisms within the elbow I can start to build up the muscles around the elbow.
I am certain that we are taking the necessary steps to ensure a successful comeback. And I am looking forward to contributing to our team's success on and off the ice. But for now I remain on the bench as another set of eyes for coach Matsos.
I hope everyone is enjoying the holiday season so far. Best of luck to you all with your Christmas shopping.
Cheers, Nate.
Monday, December 1
Time and proper rest prove effective.
I have to admit, when I first heard the specialist's diagnosis of my injury, I was a little sceptical, not to mention devastated.
"Do nothing" and "immobilization" are not words I like to incorporate into my everyday vocabulary.
To be completely honest, I probably would have pushed myself to get back on the ice a little earlier if I was not forced to take it easy. I am lucky though to have so many people in the Steelers organization that care not only about my future of playing hockey with the club, but my overall health and well being as well.
I'm very thankful for the positive encouragement I've had from the coach, general manager and supporting staff, and also for the treatment and advice of the therapists and specialists. It's very rare to find such excellent care in this line of work.
From what I understand, I am pretty fortunate to have only torn half of the ligament. It could have been much worse, and damage like that might not have been fully repairable.
There has been some recent improvement, and the suggestion is that I continue with all my regular exercises and incorporate some shoulder and grip strengthening ones as well. I met with my physiotherapist this past Thursday and we measured the flexion and extension radius of both arms.
It seems that there are only a few degrees of difference either way. I have a very limited amount of pain left in the elbow but I am still being urged to take it slow.
Andy, my physiotherapist, has stressed that during these next few weeks I shouldn't do anything to strain or over-exert the elbow. He also mentioned that weeks seven and eight are vital to the healing process as a whole, so I plan to take his advice and stick to the game plan in the hope that my patience will lead to my getting back out with the boys a little sooner.
As far as my rehabilitation exercises go, nothing has really changed besides a few minor additions. Andy has started using different methods of healing though, such as an electric muscle stimulator that sends a pulse of energy to the targeted area where gel pads are placed.
In addition, Andy also started to massage the actual ligaments and tendons within the injured elbow. Both of these things have helped to increase the blood flow as well as reduce swelling in the joint.
Aside from the therapy, I have been trying to go to the gym once a day, five days a week for 2-3 hour sessions. Sometimes, I even have enough energy to go back to the gym at night for an extra hill run or bike ride, and of course a steam room, for a little luxury.
All these things combined seem to be helping my recovery greatly. I believe that if I keep up my physical conditioning, not only will the elbow heal, but I will also be in better shape to step right back into action and play to my fullest potential.
The true test will come on Wednesday (December 3) when I will be making another visit to the team's elbow specialist.
I am sure he will twist and pull it as much, if not more than he did last time. Needless to say I did not enjoy his tests, but I am sure it's necessary because he doesn't want to throw me out on the ice if I am not properly healing.
I must confess, the last time he performed these tests I felt overwhelmingly nauseous with pain, so I hope this time around will be a little more successful to say the least.
Friday, November 21
Hard work and determination pays off!
Well, it's round two and even though I have been doing my physio exercises three times a day, the prognosis remains the same. I wouldn't necessarily say that I am discouraged with my progress thus far, but it is hard to accept that injuries like this take time, rest, and the proper rehabilitation.
To be honest I am not used to sticking with the same exercises for such a long period of time. Not to mention, being told not to push too hard or too fast. After all hockey's the exact definition of a hard and fast sport. I guess you can say it's hard to break a horse of old habits.
On, a positive note, I have been focusing most of my pent-up aggression towards working out my lower body and cardiovascular system.
This week I have tried turning the intensity up a notch. I usually start my workouts by running hills for 30 minutes on level 11. Once I am warmed up I stretch for 15 minutes, followed by abs and lower back exercises for 20 minutes. Then I move into either an upper or lower body circuit.
This means that I set up, anywhere from six to 10 exercises that work on major muscle groups. If I decide to work legs that day I pick three hamstring, three quad, two calf, and two-three extra abdominal exercises.
Since I cannot work upper body right now I have elected to incorporate some speed and agility work instead. This varies from day to day but I usually start with a 30-40 minute stair run, where I almost sprint to the top and then glide my way down.
After that I move into the speed ladder, iron cross, cones, and rubber band exercises. I have a bunch of variations but I won't bore you with the details. Needless to say that at the end of this two-hour workout I am dead tired. Oh yeah, I almost forgot to mention that I use a heart rate monitor at all times, and I make sure that it is at my target heart rate for the day.
These are only some of the workouts that I choose to do in order to stay fit to ensure a safe and healthy return. I guess a little pain is a small price to pay when you are living the life of a professional athlete.
Aside from my physical health, mentally I remain the same as last week. I think the best part of my job right now is that I am still part of the team. Even though I am behind the bench, I still get the opportunity to share in the teams successes and failures.
These ups and downs are really what define us as people, not to mention that they contribute to our everyday attitude and mode. Thank God we are winning, otherwise it would be one miserable Sheffield Hockey team, let me tell you.
We understand that the town of Sheffield shares in our joys and heartaches. This is why we feel the need to be the best. We want to continue bringing a winning attitude to the town of Sheffield, so your overall support and positive attitude is vital.
This weekend we travel to Belfast to play the Giants. Not only do we owe them a little revenge, we have yet to play a full sixty minutes against them.
I believe that this game is going to be a test of will and determination to see who comes out on top. I am confident that the boys will execute Matty's game plan, and we will be victorious.
Cheers, Nate.
Monday, November 17
Struggling through adversity - does it make us stronger?
The worst of it all is over now. By that I mean I am now working towards a comeback and no longer have to sit, rest, and let my ligament heal.
The day I stepped into the specialist's office to hear the results of my scan I was a complete rack. The doctor told me that I had two choices. One being they operate on my elbow, to which he added that the surgery was very complex and the rehabilitation would start in six months. Needless to say, I replied 'absolutely not'.
The second option was to rest it as much as possible for two weeks, put my arm in a brace and see him again at a later date. This was taking a slight chance, but it turned out to be the best.
The ligament in my arm was only torn halfway through, so the specialist told me that with good rest and the proper physiotherapy I could be back in three months. OK, it wasn't exactly what I wanted to hear but it was better then the alternative.
Right now I am doing my rehab exercises three times a day on my own. I meet with the therapist once a week and she lets me know if we can up the intensity or add more exercises.
Between practice, workouts and physiotherapy I really don't have much time for anything else. My schedule consists of me waking up, going down to the rink, visiting with the boys, watching practice and making sure things are running smoothly. Then I come home, eat lunch and go to the gym to grab a workout, with a little luxury steam room to follow.
My workouts usually consist of a 30-45 minute bike ride or run. Once I finish the majority of my cardio I make sure I can maintain my flexibility by stretching for 20 minutes. From there I do a 20-minute continuous core workout, with 15 minutes of physiotherapy exercises.
This has been my main point of focus for the last couple of weeks.
So far I feel as though we are making leaps and bounds towards a healthy and full recovery. I really don't want to jump the gun here, but my therapist seems to think that we are making some good progress.
Two weeks ago I had 32 degrees of flexibility difference between my left and right arm. Now we are looking at 24 degrees of difference.
My therapist has designed these exercises to focus on stretching the scar tissue off the ligament, while strengthening the muscles above and below the elbow. Most of these exercises are basic low resistance self-sustaining pressure and stabilizing methods.
The therapist believes that the more we try to push it the worse it will get. So, for now, we play by the rules and stick to what is working.
I think the worst part of it all is not being able to be out there on the ice with the boys. Watching 'the family' go into battle every shift and game for one another really does form a special bond and respect amongst you and your fellow team-mates.
I think this and the overall experience of playing the game you love is what I miss most right now.
Currently I am helping Matty (head coach Dave Matsos) out on the bench and I am learning a lot from him, but I still find it hard to control my emotions.
My hat goes off to any former players that are now coaches because it is really hard to take a step back and fill those shoes, rather then lacing up the skates.
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Weather for Yorkshire
Saturday 11 February 2012
Today
Sunny spells
Temperature: -2 C to 0 C
Wind Speed: 8 mph
Wind direction: South
Tomorrow
Cloudy
Temperature: 2 C to 5 C
Wind Speed: 8 mph
Wind direction: North west
