Modern Dilemmas: Caught in a cycle of the same old family rows

But what is particularly maddening is that he insists he's right. I just can't seem to let go either and always fight back and then I beat myself up for getting sucked into the same old trap again and again! How can we end this cycle?

There seems to be something so easy about arguing with your family. They are after all human beings and our most beloved, but we don't think twice about launching into a dramatic tirade when we feel put out.

We would never treat our friends like that, or we wouldn't have any, and mere strangers enjoy more consideration and respect, so it is fascinating that our favourite targets are our family members.

Usually when we engage in discussions we can learn quite a bit about ourselves or whatever subject's on the table and come away feeling enlightened having enjoyed a debate even when you don't see eye to eye.

But as you know well, if one person insists on being right it changes the dynamics quite dramatically. As both your dad and yourself don't have major arguments all the time with other people, your battle is one of egos, so no matter what the subject is you will always end up falling out.

As much as he is adamant about being right, you are adamant that he cannot win and so on and so forth.

Peace begins when one person makes the first move, a gesture of agreement, a place where you can start again. Offer this to your dad next time by way of understanding him more. If you can understand that not everyone is open minded, believe me if more people were good at that the world would be a very different place, and also the fact that your dad's ferocious need to be right comes from feeling insecure, then you can end your rows. Keep your ego in check knowing that you come from different ends of the spectrum. Agree to disagree remembering reality for each individual is whatever we believe it to be, therefore, we are ALL right and everyone wins.

Decide to spend the time you have with your dad enjoying activities that don't lend themselves to heated discussions. Make a real shift in how you approach him by being grateful he is in your life, that

he has taught you so much and that he will always be there for you. A rare person indeed. Finally, let him see his son mature into someone who has great compassion and humility, the two main ingredients for greatness.

Alexandra Watson is a leading Happiness Coach and best selling author. If you have a modern dilemma ask Alex

by going to www. AlexandraWatson.com