Modern Dilemmas: How to fall back in love with St Valentine's Day

Dear Alex – I hate Valentine's Day! It's not just because I am a single man, it's seeing the shop windows filled with hearts, chocolates and over-priced flowers that proves to me that it's more about commercialism than it is love. Every year I either feel the pressure to get a date or feel forced to be romantic with whomever I'm with. Is there a way to enjoy the day without losing your mind or your life-savings?
By The Newsroom
Published 11th Feb 2010, 10:41 BST
Updated 11th Feb 2010, 10:42 BST

Can you hear that? It's the sound of a million cash registers ringing out our love/hate relationship with Valentine's Day. We hate being pressed into being lovey-dovey at such high prices, but secretly want, and maybe even expect, something romantic to happen to us. Single or in a couple, Valentine's is probably the most complained about day after Christmas.

While Valentine's Day can be a fun opportunity for an established couple, and many women will tell you they welcome the prompt for romance after 364 days of blandness, it can be a cause of anxiety for those singles who feel the pressure and urgency to find a date. Not everyone is part of a couple, and not everyone wants to be. So let's look in to that first:

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It may be a build up over many weeks, but Valentine's is only one day. To feel you need to be on a date or part of a couple because of it is ludicrous. There are many ways of enjoying the day without being with a partner. One idea is to get all of your single mates together (male and female) and either go out as a group or have a party at home. No-one is on a date, so you can all relax.

Whatever you do, don't sit alone feeling sorry for yourself (too easy and very boring) or feeling that you are a romantic failure. You're not, it's just one day, remember!

Instead, turn it around, embrace the celebration and do something special.

Now let's look into being forced to feel romantic. It's not complicated and it's not rocket science, the point is to show someone you're close to how you feel and that could be done by the simplest of gestures. The expectations may be for chocolates, flowers and a meal out, but being creative and taking some time to think of something out of the ordinary will be really appreciated. It's putting the thought in that counts not the cash. Having a picnic at home, cooking a meal together or taking a long walk can be very romantic, giving you time to talk and reconnect with each other.

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If you find a way to enjoy the day each year, no matter what your circumstances are, and take time to tell someone, anyone, you love how they make your life better, then it's worth the so- called pressure and commercialism. Keep romance and love alive, we all need them in our lives.

Alexandra Watson is a leading Happiness Coach, best-selling author and Co-Founder of National Happiness Day. www.AlexandraWatson.com