Pleasure Island

On a map, start looking for it beneath the boot of Italy, and you'll find it 58 miles south of Sicily, and 179 miles north of Africa. Its strategic position and complex history make Malta many things to many people. It was a bridge between Europe and Africa from ancient times. Phoenicians, Romans, Arabians, Germans, the French and the British have all occupied Malta, each leaving behind a cultural and architectural legacy recently put to good use by Hollywood.

For Troy, in which Brad Pitt and Orlando Bloom waged war, the island's Fort Ricasoli played a starring role. Oliver Stone's Alexandria, starring Colin Farrell and Angelina Jolie, took over Valletta's Grand Harbour, doubling it for the ancient port of Alexandria. And if you thought Russell Crowe was fighting at Rome's Colosseum in Gladiator, look again, because he was actually clanging swords at a replica, again at Fort Ricasoli.

The ash of real battles past has long since settled. What remains is a quirky place with a distinctive, Mediterranean, character of its own. It's noisy and colourful, the people are charming and friendly and its market squares are a bright, cacophonous display of church bells, flower stalls and pavement cafs.

It's the smallest country of the European Union (122 square miles – you can drive from its furthest points in an hour) and the euro was recently introduced. Arabic influences can be heard in the Maltese language, while the cuisine is largely Sicilian-inspired, with lots of olives, fish and cheese. English is widely spoken.

Medina is a good place to start exploring, offering a sightseeing key to the island's story. This is the old capital of Malta, a walled town high on a hill in the centre of the island, originally the home of the Phoenicians around 700BC. Under the Roman Empire, the governor built his palace here and it's said St Paul lived in the city after being shipwrecked.

The Arabs came in 870AD and the Normans in 1091 before the island passed to the Order of Knights of St John of Jerusalem set up in outposts along the route to the Holy Land, to assist pilgrims and provide medical assistance. In return for the lives saved, the Order received newly-conquered territories that had to be defended.

The knights rebuilt Medina following an earthquake in 1693 in Baroque style. Large squares of opulent grandeur are set amid labyrinthine medieval streets. The knights also bequeathed their symbol to the island, now known as the Maltese Cross.

Most visitors today are British. The link goes back to 1814 and British influences remain remarkably in evidence, including the red telephone boxes plonked incongruously in ancient town squares.

It's not hard to see why we love it so for holidays, meeting as it does our needs for culture and architecture, beautiful beaches, delicious food and excellent, not-too-expensive accommodation.

Many of its holidaymakers fall into the 60-plus age bracket, although Malta is seeking to encourage more young people to come with an annual music festival. It's an excellent family destination, too, offering safety and good value and plenty to do, enough for two weeks at least.

The Maltese have been inventive in catering for our needs and tastes, as the Fortina Spa Hotel, which overlooks the port and old city of Valetta, illustrates (if the name is familiar, that's because it sponsors Sheffield United, the owner being a mad-keen football fan).

It's a spa hotel in the true sense of the word, devoted to body and mind, with each bedroom equipped with state-of-the-art equipment the like of which I have never experienced. I can only imagine it is reminiscent of the grand old days of English spa towns such as Bath and Harrogate.

The hotel is fast becoming quite a hangout for British football teams and celebs (presenter Gail Porter and former Eastenders' Natalie Cassidy are recent visitors). They come to try out its recuperative treatments both in the hotel's staffed spas and in the personal bedrooms. The Wellness Rejuvenation bedrooms include a personal Power Plate (giving you the equivalent of a full body workout in just 15 minutes – just hold on tight), plus magnetic beds that guarantee an excellent night's sleep, reduce pain and stimulate circulation.

Or try a Therapeutic Spa bedroom that has a Dermalife – a huge white pod you lie inside for various detoxifying heat and steam treatments. Rooms have spa baths and saunas, too. In the hotel spa, you can even have a pedicure by sticking your feet inside a tank of skin-nibbling fish – an odd sensation which some people actually enjoy (though not me).

If you prefer to meet fish in their

natural habitat, the harbour across the road provides boat trips out to the heavenly Blue Lagoon, at neighbouring Maltese island, Comino. This popular natural tourist spot has crystal clear water, perfect for a spot of swimming and snorkling, after which you can lie back on deck with a cool glass of wine and a plate of local bread and olives.

Pure, simple pleasures, without a gizmo in sight.