Talking the fear away gave me my life back

I developed a phobia of being sick (emetophobia) in my second year at university, about six years ago. I don't know what triggered it, just one day I felt really nauseous.

I went to the doctor, who prescribed an anti-nausea drug. They worked, but only for about half an hour. Before I knew it I was caught in a vicious circle. Even standing in a queue to buy a pint of milk was horrible. I used to panic, thinking I was going to be sick, and have to run out. Every five minutes I'd get that awful wave of nausea.

It started to dominate my thoughts and I stopped doing everyday things. Being a student is supposed to be the best social time of your life, but I stayed locked up in my room, watching TV in my "safe place".

I started to get really depressed and I would cry a lot. No matter what I did, the thoughts of "I'm going to be sick", never left my mind, the only time it did was if I was asleep. So I started sleeping too much.

My university attendance went way down. I started to get obsessed with food. I'd only cook it myself and would never eat out.

Then I started to mainly just eat apples – they were my "safe" food. My weight plummeted rapidly, at my lightest I was around six stone. I also got addicted to the anti-nausea pills.

A concerned friend made me go back to the doctor again, who recommended I have some counselling. After the first session, I was told I had emetophobia. I didn't even know that it was a phobia until that point.

The counsellor suggested I had some Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), a way of talking about how you think about yourself, the world and other people and how what you do affects your thoughts and feelings. CBT can help you to change how you think ("Cognitive") and what you do ("Behaviour"). Unlike some of the other talking treatments, it focuses on the "here and now" problems, instead of the causes in the past.

There are different forms of CBT, but mine was designed to help me to start doing things again. Phobias tend to manifest themselves into other phobias. I'd developed agoraphobia too, as my worst nightmare was being out and having to be sick in front of someone. A lot of my therapy involved distraction techniques. If I was standing in a queue, I was taught to open and close my hands slowly, which took my mind off negative thoughts by focussing on something else.

It took time, effort and a lot of tears, but I got there in the end. I'd recommend CBT to anybody who needs it. It's by no means a magic wand treatment, and you have to put the effort in. But by helping to control your feelings and thoughts, it leaves you with a manageable solution.

I still have my phobia, but it's controlled now.

NEW ATTITUDE TO MENTAL HEALTH

One in four people will suffer from a form of mental illness at some point in their lives.

The NHS has launched a changed approach to the treatment of mental illness – particularly depression and anxiety disorders – with its Improving Access to Psychological Therapies (IAPT) programme.

Health insurance firm Westfield Health has introduced Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) as part of its packages. www.westfieldhealth.com