My funny Valentine

I hesitate calling it a lingerie drawer. Lingerie suggests a collection of wispy, silky, sophisticated and French looking pieces of fabric edged with antique lace, not the chaotic gathering of assorted bras, knickers, all-in-ones and tights, in a variety of colours, condition and sizes, that can be found on so many of our chests of drawers.

It’s time for a clearout, so pull out the whole lot and go through it, throwing away anything that no longer fits, or has holes – never mind that no one can see them apart from your significant other, who doesn’t count – and then take a long hard look at what you’ve got left. Any items that you haven’t worn for more than a year, chuck, and that includes those glittery tights that you brought in the sales years ago, certain that they would look great with something at some point, They never have and they never will, so give up.

Now it’s time to invest in new underwear. Note, I’m still hesitating to call it lingerie, because I’m afraid wispy, lacy stuff does make me think itchy, uncomfortable stuff, although I know that does not have to be the case. Just take a look at the fabulously cosy yet chic cotton long-sleeve body from North Yorkshire based Bella di Notte, above centre. For any men who happen to be reading in search of fail-safe lingerie gifts that will be warmly accepted, this is a winner – stretchy, comfortable and sexy, and it comes in different versions and colours.

The supermarkets are a great place to look too, especially for work-a-day, comfortable, reasonably priced but really very attractive pieces. Special mention here to Tesco and Sainsbury’s.

BHS is another brand whose underwear offering is worth investigating, especially now its design team is coming up with pieces that will work well with current fashion trends – for example, the waist cincher knickers, right, are ideal for wearing under both Fifties’ style skirts and dresses and Seventies’ style high-waist trousers and all-in-ones.

Those men who still want to go ahead and buy lingerie for their partner might fare better if they stick to the underwear-meets-sleepwear lines, such as vest tops and matching shorts or PJ bottoms.

Check out the correct sizes by looking at labels inside the ones she wears all the time. If she never wears silky items, don’t buy her silky items, because she obviously doesn’t like them. Apply the same rule to buying all items of lingerie.

Observe what she wears now and buy more expensive versions. But don’t just rummage at the back of her underwear drawer and pull out items she never wears. She probably hasn’t cleared it out yet.