‘I gave away twin babies ... it is the best thing I’ve ever done’

Amy Bellamy has given her cousin the ultimate gift – her own family. Now they are campaigning for maternity rights for women who use surrogates. Catherine Scott reports.

BEAMING Jane Kassim cuddles her precious twin girls tight.

They are her pride and joy, but they almost never were.

Jane was born without a womb and so her only chance of having her own children was to find a surrogate who would have them for her.

But Jane and husband Adis couldn’t afford the thousands of pounds needed to pay a private surrogate’s expenses and so their hopes of having their only family were dashed.

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But when Jane’s cousin Amy Bellamy saw her cuddling her own baby son Archie, she knew what she had to do.

“It all started as a bit of a joke at first. I said ‘I’ll have a baby for you Jane.’ None us took it really seriously,” says Amy, 26.

But a few days later Amy learnt that Jane was in the process of having some eggs harvested, as although she didn’t have a womb she did have ovaries. Six eggs were taken to be fertilised by Adis’s sperm through IVF.

“I started to really think about it then. I spoke to Steve, who was then my partner, and told him what I wanted to do. But I let him think about it for a couple of weeks. I wanted him to be sure that it was the right thing for him before I offered to help Jane. I needed to know that he was going to be fine for me to be pregnant but not with his child,”

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When she was sure Steve was certain, they went to see Jane and Adis .

“They were a bit gobsmacked,” says Amy, from Rotherham.

After both women had undergone counselling, in September 2010 two unsuccessful attempts to implant an embryo were made. The third attempt was their last chance.

“We didn’t tell anyone that we were going to have the last embryo implanted, not even our family. It is a traumatic process for everyone and we knew if this failed it was their last chance.

“We just thought let’s do it and fingers crossed.”

Two weeks later, after Amy had some blood tests, Jane called her.

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“She said: ‘Bad news, you are going to have to look after yourself for the next nine months’. Then we both just started screaming.”

It was at the six week scan that they discovered Amy was carrying twins, despite only one embryo being implanted.

“Jane had always wanted two kids, so what better way. But I have to admit it was a bit of a shock. I’d had an easy pregnancy with Archie, but I was a little worried about having twins.”

Amy was right to be worried.

The pregnancy wasn’t easy. On learning that Amy’s dad was suffering from terminal cancer, Amy and Steve brought their wedding forward so he could walk her down the aisle. Tragically, he died just days before the wedding, when she was 22 weeks pregnant,

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“It was a really difficult time. My dad died, we got married on the Saturday, then we had his funeral on the Wednesday and then we went on honeymoon. I just kept thinking that I had two babies inside me who needed me to keep strong and healthy.”

Then Amy started to get complications with the pregnancy.

She was admitted to hospital suffering pre-eclampsia, and kept in for the last two weeks of her pregnancy. But finally, on March 16 this year, Jane watched as Amy gave birth by caesarean section to healthy twins Isla Jane and Ivy May.

“We had planned it all. The babies were taken from me and handed straight to Jane.

People ask me how I could give them away, but they were never mine to keep and so I was fine about it., In fact I’d had so many complications I was actually quite relieved. And to see the look on her face when those babies came out made it all worthwhile. I am just sad that my dad wasn’t around to see them. He had been so excited by the fact I was having twins for Jane.”

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Amy needed a blood transfusion, and had to stay in hospital for nine days – but she has no regrets about her incredible sacrifice.

“Helping Jane and Adis have children is the best thing I’ve ever done. I’m so happy for them – they’ll make the best parents. Those babies will want for nothing. People say I’ve done something amazing. I don’t see it that way. I am very proud of what I’ve done, they are beautiful babies and I have helped make them and make a family. But it was just something I had to do.”

Meanwhile, Jane is overwhelmed by the gift her cousin had given her.

“When they were born, I couldn’t stop crying,” she admits.

Through their shared experience, the cousins have become incredibly close, and Amy now sees the twins regularly along with Amy’s little boy Archie, three.

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“He knew I was expecting twins, but he always knew that I was having them for Jane. He used to pat my tummy and say, ‘Jane’s babies.’”

The cousins have also become campaigners for the rights of women who have children through a surrogate to take maternity leave, setting up a Facebook group and lobbying their local MP.

“If Jane had adopted the babies she would have had maternity rights, but because they were her babies she wasn’t entitled to anything, although her employers have been very good.

“We also had to have mine and Steve’s names on the babies’ birth certificates for the first six months and then Jane and Adis had to apply to get that changed. If the babies had needed any hospital treatment in that time then we would have to have given our permission.” The cousins have lobbied their MP John Healey who has taken the matter up and have also launched an e-petition to try to change the law.

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“It’s not about maternity pay,” says Amy. “It’s about the needs of the child in the first few months of its life. It needs its mum or dad around. It’s about being able to bond with your child. Surrogacy is not as unusual as it once was. Last year 138 babies were born in the UK to surrogates.

“It is time the law caught up.”

But first and foremost, Jane is simply full of gratitude for the gift her cousin has given her. “She’s amazing – she’s given us our dream life,” she says. “We’re so grateful too her – she’s totally selfless, and got nothing in return. Not many people would do what she did.”

Amy has now been shortlisted as one of Cosmopolitan’s Ultimate Women of the Year.

She will learn on Tuesday at the event which celebrates both celebrities and real-life winners whether she has won in the Ultimate Family category.

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The awards are being hosted at the V&A by Fearne Cotton, heavily pregnant herself.

Twitter@ypcscott

Battle for fairer surrogacy laws

The UK’s surrogacy laws were designed in 1990 and many believe the time has come to overhaul them.

In April, Wentworth MP John Healey raised the matter of unfair surrogacy laws in Parliament after he was approached by Amy Bellamy and Jane Kassim. It was the first time the issue had been properly raised in the House of Commons.

Mr Healey, in a Ten Minute Rule motion, told MPs of the need for proper maternity leave and pay for mothers through surrogacy in UK.

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At the moment mothers like Jane, a teaching assistant, are only entitled to 13 weeks unpaid parently leave. A cross-
party group of MPs is now expected to meet the Minister for Employment to press for government-led change.

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