Commons sketch: A Parliament full of toddlers throwing a tantrum when things don't go their way

Boris Johnson in the House of Commons on Saturday. Photo: PA
Boris Johnson in the House of Commons on Saturday. Photo: PA
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This is truly a Parliament of toddlers, throwing their toys out of the pram when things don’t go their way.

Boris Johnson sat arms crossed, shoulders hunched, bottom lip out as MPs voted through the Letwin amendment on Saturday.

His big day, the day he was going to save Brexit and be carried out of the Commons by his cheering colleagues, was scuppered. Although not forever, as Boris will surely still get his deal through, he will just have to be patient - a characteristic not becoming of our Prime Minister.

His churlishness continued as journalists questioned his official spokesman afterwards. What does it mean? What will the PM do next? Will he actually send the letter required by the Benn Act? Or will he take his preferred route over an extension and “die in a ditch”?

But hacks were left wanting as on instructions presumably given by Plotter-in-Chief Dominic Cummings, spokesmen kept tight lipped about what the PM would do next, simply pointing to his less-than-clear words in the chamber.

Of course Mr Johnson wasn’t the only one to throw a tantrum.

When absent MP Jared O’Mara was reported to be on his way to Parliament to vote for the first time since April, his Sheffield Hallam constituents could barely believe it.

And when this reporter spent an hour waiting for him to arrive at Westminster tube station - dodging signs liable to take her out at the knee held by well-meaning yuppies heading to the People’s Vote March - there was an assumption maybe he’d just been heading to London to catch a show instead.

But vote he did and it was against the Government.

When Mr O’Mara was tracked down, he refused to answer questions and threatened to call the police. Some would say Mr O’Mara should be left alone because of the problems he has suffered with his mental health. There is no denying he should receive every piece of help he needs and deserves, mental health is no laughing matter.

But while Mr O’Mara is still drawing on his £79,000 a year MP salary, the area’s Lib Dem prospective candidate is picking up some of the casework on a voluntary and unpaid basis, there’s no debate that he should answer some fair questions.

In just the latest Kevin the Teenager-like act of the day, Mr O’Mara summoned his father away when he tried to explain his son didn’t want to talk.

“God dad, you’re SO embarrassing.”

The final middle finger of the day to voters who would like to see just a little bit of grown up politics in the ancient house came as Mr Johnson did send the anticipated letter to the EU, but refused to sign it and sent his own follow up basically saying how he was forced to write the first one.

For all the talk of a secret genius plan to get around the Benn Act, it seems the secret genius was simply to pretend there was a secret genius, and then have a sulk when all became clear.