Review: The Lords of Salem

Flashing back and forth between 1696 and the present day Rob Zombie’s The Lords of Salem attempts to connect ancient black magic with modern possession courtesy of his wife Sheri Moon Zombie and a coven of modern witches.
By Tony Earnshaw
Published 26th Apr 2013, 10:16 BST

Heidi (the current Mrs Zombie) is a rock chick radio DJ who receives a mysterious LP from a new band, The Lords which, when played, invades her mind with creepy hallucinatory memories of the town’s past.

Soon Heidi is channelling negative energy which local writer Francis (Bruce Davison) recognises as linking to legendary witch Margaret Morgan (Meg Foster) and the curse she placed on her killers.

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But what begins as a weird and unsettling portrait of good versus evil in the 17th century rapidly becomes a formless melange of pop video excess and cheap tricks as Zombie loses his way.

And when he tries to emulate Roman Polanski’s Rosemary’s Baby one thing becomes clear very quickly: Rob Zombie is no Polanski.

The film’s saving grace comes courtesy of a gimmick: the inspired casting of Judy Geeson, Patricia Quinn and Dee Wallace as the modern-day coven of three sisters. From the moment they are seen together it is clear that these are three older women not to be trifled with. The mood changes markedly and momentarily the film is elevated to the standard it aspires to.

Meg Foster also scores highly as the leader of a band of cackling hags dancing naked around a fire as they deny God and worship Lucifer. Had Zombie decided to base his tale in Olde Worlde America then the power of this prologue may well have transferred to the entire picture. Not scary, just weird, The Lords of Salem promises a great deal more than it delivers.