How Margaret Thatcher would have tackled the crisis we currently face - Bernard Ingham

In my time in the Civil Service I served six other Cabinet Ministers – Barbara Castle, Robert Carr, Maurice Macmillan, Lord Carrington, Eric Verley and Tony Benn. All of them, I firmly believe, would share Mrs Thatcher’s shock. We then had a Civil Service that ran on oiled wheels. Now we have one that often doesn’t run on anything other than its inertia, following fashion into striking and, according to many reports, active obstruction from the mandarinate, notably over getting rid post-Brexit of EU red tape.

This is a gross dereliction of duty which will only be ended by the very firm smack of government. After all, what is the point of elections if the government is frustrated at every turn?

In my musings my thoughts then turn to what Mrs Thatcher would do about it. She was more cautious in her approach to policy and measures than many believe. But such is the crisis in the UK’s government system that I would not be in the least surprised if she attacked – and I mean attacked – the problem ruthlessly. She was above all a patriot and the thought of Britain being allowed to go to the dogs by default would supercharge her efforts.

Consequently, she would begin with an emergency meeting with the Cabinet Secretary and the heads of Government Departments – the Permanent Secretaries as they are called. It would go something like this:

“Ladies and gentlemen,

“I have called you together to let you know that things cannot go on as they are. Otherwise, Britain will spiral down in decline. As the people responsible for the efficiency of the Government machine, I am giving you until Monday to engineer a complete change of attitude throughout the service. Either on Monday we find a willing, co-operative system or you will be replaced where the transformation is less than convincing. I believe in personal responsibility. Now is your chance to show it.

“To help you on your way you can inform your Departments that a complete return to the office – no more working from home without special dispensation – is the minimum required. The backsliders will be earmarked for early redundancy.

“I also intend to bring forward legislation banning strikes in the public service. There is no rhyme nor reason why only the police should be denied strike action when as recent events have demonstrated lives are at risk from many public service withdrawals of labour. I do not wish to hear pleas about human rights of workers when so many public servants are violating the rights of ordinary taxpayers to reliable vital services for which they pay.

“It is said that my party loses votes every time some dim-witted giggery-wokery human resources department puts out guidance on how to handle slavery, empire, race, gender and ‘inclusivity’. Well, you can tell them we are not losing any more. It is outrageous that millions are being spent on this nonsense at a time of economic difficulty. It is another sign that the government machine is out of control.

“Every instance of continuing wokery in the Government machine will bring the sacking of the officials responsible. They ought to have more sense. Simultaneously, £10m will be docked from their budgets since they clearly don’t know how to look after public money. Academia had better watch out. The taxpayer does not fund it to addle the brains of students.

“By now it should be clear to the most resistant of you to change that I mean business. We are living in perhaps the most dangerous decade since the 1940s. The situation demands that we are all in top form instead of weighed down with weird ideas about entitlements.

“Right, the clock is ticking. Next Monday is the day Britain starts its comeback, aided by a Government machine that faithfully discharges its responsibilities to the people and the nation.”