The Queen showed why we shouldn’t write people off because of their age - Daxa Patel

The Queen epitomised grace, duty, love, wisdom, stoicism, and national pride in abundance. She was like a second parent, a solid figure of continuity who was always there to steady the ship in turbulent waters. King Charles will no doubt continue her legacy in his own unique way.

When the Queen died, she was aged 96. The general perception of her was that she was our monarch and the Queen, hardly anyone focused too much on her being an old person.

We live in a society where as soon as someone turns 60, they are consigned to the box labelled ‘senior citizens’ as if they have passed their sell-by date. It is convenient to put people in boxes, but we lose out so much by treating them as relics.

Two days before the Queen died, she met with the outgoing Prime Minister and appointed Liz Truss as the next. She was not known for shirking her duty because her whole life since the age of 21 was devoted to serving her people.

This might be an outdated concept, but she reminded us of how potentially we can be. Her deep sense of duty of giving, and sharing, and respect for others is worth emulating.

I do not recall ever seeing the Queen on the TV not smartly dressed or without her red lipstick. Older people are proud citizens of our nation, and they all deserve to be treated as equals, but we may have unglamorous beliefs.

We now have a monarch who is in his 70s. He is a good decent human being who is proud to be British yet diverse and inclusive.

He has every right to be treated with respect and he has every right to contribute. He also has every right to be seen as equal and not to be discarded to the side as if he has nothing to give because we know he wants to serve. We can treat others the same way.

As an immigrant’s daughter, I have seen how open-hearted older people are when it comes to differences.

It is not always comfortable, but they are at the core of their being very decent and warm people.

Why can’t we, the slightly younger generation take a leaf out of their book and since we fit the sandwich generation educate society to treat age as just a number.

Let’s not put people in boxes before their time or treat them as if they do not matter, and let’s tap into their wisdom and knowledge and enrich our own lives. Approximately, 19 per cent of our population are over the age of 65.

According to the Office for National Statistics, estimates of the very old, including centenarians, UK: 2002 to 2020 Census 2021, the number of centenarians in the UK rose to its highest ever level in 2020, reaching 15,120, an increase of almost a fifth from previous year.

The large increase in centenarians in 2020 in the UK was driven by a 52 per cent increase in those aged 100 years from the previous year so by now about 20,000 of our population are likely to be over age 100 even accounting for access and needless deaths during the pandemic. Aside from allowing for their care needs we must ask do we really value them?

The Queen made a magnificent contribution to our lives and around the globe. She was also the Queen of 15 commonwealth counties and was seen as the Queen by other nations.

The outpouring of grief from all corners of the globe was a testament to her standing amongst people from all walks of life.

Our general perception of her was that she was our Queen rather than of her as an old person, and she did not fail to inspire us.

Mostly those providing care to older people do so with great compassion just as it should be, but unless we stop casting older people to the sidelines instead of ensuring they feel valued, wanted, and integrated in our society, we risk having a younger generation grow up being deprived of the wisdom of these wise souls.

The older generation have been through the first and second world war, they have seen hardship and they are a resilient bunch. In a world where we are attached to our mobile phones as if it was a part of our anatomy, and we have no time to look up to say hello to one another, we are losing the essence of being human, and the connection to others who have the potential to enrich our lives.

The Queen has left a rich tapestry of qualities that we can all learn from and try to emulate in our own ordinary ways, but if nothing else, let’s learn to see others in her age group with the same deference we saw her. That would be a fitting tribute to our Queen.

Daxa Patel is a solicitor, author and executive coach.