August 14: Possessed by despair over Cherries’ own goal

TO me, the football season always seems to start one month too early because the cricket 
season is still in full swing with hot temperatures very 
likely in early August (Tom Richmond, The Yorkshire Post, August 8).

The first day of the new season has also brought with it the feral apostrophe that has been the subject of recent correspondence.

Bournemouth FC (The Cherries) were promoted to the Premier League and a TV reporter was interviewing fans on the seafront before their first match.

The female proprietor of a 
café admitted that she had foolishly promised to change
the name of her cafe in the unlikely event of Bournemouth achieving promotion, which they did.

The camera showed a shot of her underneath the changed name which is now “Cherrie’s” which is grammatically impossible (unless, of course, her name is Cherrie, which it isn’t).

She is obviously as unaware 
of the aberrant apostrophe 
as her sign writer seems to 
be.

I am still trying to think of a single word that will combine the two words “catastrophe” and “apostrophe”.