Helpful taxman helped cure my form phobia

IT has been reported that children who abscond from school may have a school phobia. Could it be possible that I have developed an allergy to forms, which may have lain dormant for some years?

Certainly the sight of an official envelope containing enclosures is now sufficient to fill me with anticipatory dread. A recent document from HM Revenue & Customs was responsible for a couple of semi-sleepless nights.

Taking myself in hand, I managed to phone for help but, by the time I had navigated my way through the automated voiced instructions and pressed the required numbers, I was in a state of nervous collapse and was practically incoherent when I finally contacted a living person.

However, the gentleman was most helpful, calm and professional. He guided me through the questionnaire with consummate patience and 
never gave any sign that he thought I was a complete nincompoop.

Such was my overwhelming relief and profound gratitude, that I told him how wonderful he was.

There was no reply so I 
repeated my praise, just in case he hadn’t heard. The silence continued.

“Has nobody ever told you how wonderful you are?” I asked.

Very quietly and seriously, he said, “No, I don’t think they have”. I don’t suppose they have a lot of fun in HM Revenue & Customs, but I do hope that gentleman had a chuckle when he went home.

It’s so important to laugh, especially as we grow older, otherwise we might cry. As a codicil, may I express my gratitude to the creators of 
Horace & Doris in our great newspaper? They are consistently funny and often make me laugh out loud.