'Like walking on eggshells': The reality for Yorkshire victims of emotionally abusive relationships

It comes as Justice Secretary Robert Buckland has promised help for all victims of domestic abuse during the lockdown, while victims commissioner Vera Baird has said a "tsunami" of reports of abuse are expected in this period.

Controlling and coercive behaviour in relationships became a crime in 2015, and is punishable by up to five years in prison.

It is defined as long-term controlling behaviour from partners, including bullying, degrading, gaslighting (tricking a person into doubting their sanity) and controlling someone's finances or stopping them from seeing friends or family.

Laura Riley set up Sheffield-based charity Mums In Need after her own experience of an emotionally abusive partner.

The charity provides emotional and legal support to mothers who have left emotionally-abusive relationships, but with whom they have children so have to maintain contact.

She said: "It was like walking on eggshells. He used to put his face to my face and call me stupid.

"He used to expect me to pay all the rent and bills while I was pregnant and had no money coming in. He would take my car and just leave it somewhere and I would get loads of parking tickets."

Ms Riley said the difficulty for mothers who have escaped emotionally abusive relationships is that their former partners may have no criminal convictions as it is harder to provide proof of non-physical abuse.

"Often, there is no evidence to suggest he should not keep seeing the children.

"I think the biggest issue is that women generally are not really listened to. There is still this stereotype about domestic abuse in that what happens behind closed doors should stay behind closed doors."

The charity Mums in Need meanwhile remains reliant on grants and donations to survive, without which it would no longer be able to support mothers going through the courts and long-term psychological effects of emotional abuse.

Freedom of Information requests to Yorkshire's police forces revealed that between 10 and 31 per cent of those arrested for controlling and coercive behaviour were charged, while the vast majority were male.

West Yorkshire Police made 989 arrests for the crime between 2016 and 2018, charging 105 (10.6 per cent). Of those, all but one were male.

North Yorkshire Police similarly made 339 arrests between 2016 and 2019, and although the force did not disclose how many were charged, it revealed that 228 (67 per cent) of those arrested were male.

There were 162 arrests made by South Yorkshire Police between 2016 and 2017, according to the most recent data available, resulting in 50 people charged (31 per cent) of which 43 were male and seven were female.

The force revealed that the most common reason for no charges being brought, however, was the victim no longer supporting the case. This was the reason listed for just over half (50.6 per cent) of all cases dropped.

Humberside Police revealed it had 384 records of arrests made for the offence between June 2017 and 2019, of which 65 (17 per cent) were charged.

Assistant Chief Constable Catherine Hankinson, of West Yorkshire Police, said: "Despite the ongoing demand from the Covid-19 pandemic, domestic violence and coercive and controlling behaviour remains a priority and we will support you however we can."

Meanwhile, Superintendent Shelley Hemsley, who is South Yorkshire Police's lead for domestic abuse, said victims may be experienced "heightened anxiety" while having to stay at home with controlling partners.

“It’s really important to remember that domestic abuse isn’t just about physical violence," she said. “Coercive and controlling behaviour is another element of domestic abuse and in the current circumstances, could see victims in South Yorkshire being prevented from leaving the house at all. It could also mean that victims are being actively prevented from contacting their friends and family on the phone, monitoring their online activity or social media accounts, depriving them of access to support or medical services."

North Yorkshire Police said that such crimes "erode a victim's sense of self, their confidence and independence" and added that it has been working with a survivor of coercive control as part of officers' training and campaigns to raise awareness.

The Crown Prosecution Service has reiterated that domestic abuse was a top priority, and that it holds regular, independent scrutiny panels to analyse decisions over such cases.

Gerry Wareham, Chief crown Prosecutor CPS Yorkshire and Humberside said: “Not all domestic violence is physical. Coercive and controlling behaviour is domestic abuse by manipulation and psychological abuse and the harm caused can be incalculable.

“All our lawyers have received training in how best to charge and prosecute cases involving coercive and controlling behaviour in order to ensure the most positive possible outcome for the victim and society.

“We understand that under current circumstances this may be a time of increased concern for those enduring any form of domestic abuse. Please remain confident that our focus on this serious and vile criminality has not wavered. Prosecutions of offences of domestic abuse remain a high priority across the criminal justice system.”

Opening the second reading debate on the Domestic Abuse Bill yesterday (Tuesday), Justice Secretary Robert Buckland said: "The concept of the home as a refuge is such a strong one and yet for too many people it is not. And at this time of lockdown that fear, that distress, that suffering is multiplied.

"I want to assure all victims that help is available. The police continue to respond to incidents of domestic abuse and anyone in immediate danger should not hesitate to call 999 and the emergency services.