Human decency matters more than ever if we’re to pull through – Jayne Dowle

It’s bad enough when neighbours feel obliged to snoop on neighbours. I’m hearing of individuals – who clearly need to occupy their time more productively – timing the people next door to see how long they take on their daily exercise and filing a report to the police if they deem regulations have been infringed.

And it’s difficult enough in families, when some members may still be working on full pay, albeit from home, and others are self-employed or shoulder the responsibility of running their own business.

However, enforced social and financial divisions are also breeding resentment and distrust on a wider scale. I’m reminded of what happened in communities like mine during the industrial unrest of the 20th century. Memories run as deep as the coal seams beneath us.

When I was a girl, my grandad would mention local families still ostracised because they were on the ‘wrong’ side in the 1926 General Strike – already six decades in the past, but still fresh in the mind.

Now, however, we’re reawakening the sense of solidarity our mothers and fathers found during the strike years of the 1980s. It’s probably no coincidence that, once again, the former miners’ welfare hall and sports association has become the focus for local community action; cricket club volunteers are taking a pivotal role in delivering shopping and prescriptions to elderly and vulnerable people.

When I witness such selfless behaviour, I’m struggling to reconcile it with the story I 
heard the other day from a family friend. A care worker she knows was taking an elderly gentleman for a walk around the block in a wheelchair; not flouting any regulations on daily exercise.

An unknown motorist pulled up, wound down the window, hurled abuse about spreading coronavirus and then threw a bottle of warm liquid over both of them before speeding off.

As if working and living in a care home is not difficult and frightening enough right now, with such a shortage of PPE equipment and a rising death toll. What kind of sick motivation is determining such behaviour?

For every disturbing case which makes the headlines – such as that of Bex Williams, the young Cambridgeshire nurse who came home from a 12-hour shift to a note from her neighbours calling her a disgrace and informing her that ‘she had been reported’ – there must be hundreds of incidents going on under the radar.

Behaviour which would have provoked outrage in ‘normal’ times, or at least merited a 
police visit, is now accepted. 
It shouldn’t be. We will eventually emerge from this crisis stronger as a country, 
I’m sure. However, we should not be prepared to sacrifice kindness, respect and human decency as collateral damage as we do so.

We need to remember tolerance. And not allow our fears to rule us. On Easter Sunday, just as we were about to sit down to our foreshortened family meal, our neighbour knocked on the door then retreated to a safe distance.

She’d placed on the step two bottles of wine and a home-made chocolate cheesecake ‘for Easter, and to cheer you up’. Perfect timing. We thanked her profusely – such kindnesses make lockdown slightly more tolerable – and promptly tucked in.

Now, the official guidance (I checked) would be to refuse the cheesecake because it was made by a neighbour, who could potentially be infected with coronavirus. How rude would that have been? It would make no sense, either, because millions of house-bound people are enjoying takeaways delivered to their door. It’s important to balance out self-protection with consideration for the feelings of others.

I’ll say that, if I may, to the lady who almost jumped over a bus shelter to avoid me and the dog having a walk. I assured her that he was perfectly harmless – unless you’re a cat – but she spat out something about social distancing.

We should be coming together – or at least within three feet of each other – instead of creating such stressful divisions. There is much that I don’t like about 
this crisis, but the one thing 
that disturbs me above all is 
that it is highlighting every crack in society. Let’s all try, for everyone’s sake, to pull together, not apart.

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