We need to set a good example for future generations by putting our mobile phones away - Daxa Patel

Mostly, multitasking causes no major issues, but it does belittle people and make them feel as if they are not valued, seen, or heard fully.

Whenever I watch PMQs or any debate in the Houses of Parliament I always find it rather discourteous seeing some MPs with their heads down either reading on their mobile phones or texting away. How rude and that too in this sacred place of democracy? And more importantly, what impression are these politicians giving to us mere mortals? Members of parliament have earned the right to be in the chambers because they were voted in by thousands of their constituents.

Politicians are struggling to be seen as serious public servants and using mobile phones in chambers hardly projects a positive image of them. If politicians are to be taken seriously then they must consider how they project themselves. In chambers when someone is speaking the others ought to be paying attention even if the subject matter is not to their taste just as they would like others to listen to them when they get up and speak. It is called respect and paying attention.

With role models like this, people sitting in restaurants with friends and family cannot be blamed for keeping their eyes focused on their phone rather than being present with those at their table. I am not against the use of mobile phones as I know how valuable this tool is, but it is easy to be distracted by the constant notifications on some social media or the arrival of an email or text.

We have become desensitised to the rudeness and disrespect caused in our day to day lives as acceptable. How often have we found ourselves on the phone when the person we are speaking to will say, hang on, I have another call coming through, let me answer that.

Then as if this is not bad enough, we come across those who want to make WhatsApp video calls while they are eating, I mean either you want to have a meaningful conversation, or you want to eat.

With the pandemic and the increased usage of the internet more people are suffering from mental isolation. There are youngsters who suffer from social anxiety and are unable to have a conversation because having a proper in-depth conversation seems a rarity nowadays. If we do not tackle this runaway train of not paying attention, more people will suffer from attention deficit conditions.

Society does not decline overnight; it is a gradual process of declining morals and standards of behaviours which if not tackled can become embedded into something unsightly. The new generation learns from what they see.

I read the other day that one utility company was advising against giving children under eleven a mobile phone. We are asking schools and by proxy, teachers to monitor the use of mobile phones but surely, this must be parental responsibility. Teaching the difference between right and wrong, respect and disrespect is the responsibility of the parents to pass on to their children, society will add their influence, and each one of us bear responsibility as others will learn from our appropriate or inappropriate actions or inactions in public.

The declining standards of behaviour in public where people no longer look up to see one another or listen means we are in danger of saying ‘I don’t care if you exist.’ This worries me. Likes and comments on social media are of no value if we cannot respect the being in front of us right now.

I am trying to convey here that little things matter, all human behaviours have repercussions and others learn from how all of us behave. The good old fashion custom where a gentleman would remove his hat when saying good morning to a lady (my dad always did that) or when a person would get up from his or her bus seat to allow an elderly or a mum with a child to sit down on a crowded bus, is like a century ago, but these old ways displayed respect and courtesy which are needed even more so in this modern day.

In conclusion, the small gestures of respect and courtesy that once defined our social interactions must not be lost in the tidal wave of modern distractions. Every action, every moment of attention, shapes the fabric of our society. When we lift our heads from our screens and engage fully with the people around us, we reinforce the values of empathy, respect, and community. Leaders, public figures, and each one of us have a role to play in setting this example. Our children and future generations will learn from what they observe in us. Let us cultivate a world where simple acts of kindness and genuine attention are the norm, not the exception.

Daxa Manhar Patel is a leadership coach, author and solicitor.