Why it’s important that farmers make some time for themselves - Sarah Todd

No formal diagnosis has been made but with the list of symptoms of a midlife crisis including ‘increased feelings of nostalgia’ and ‘ruminating over past experiences’, there seems little doubt that this stage in life has been reached.

Thoughts are with so many people who will not get to this bump in the road, which experts say typically takes place somewhere between the ages of 40 and 60.

Of course, after the recent announcement of his death at just 41 the inspirational former rugby league hero and Motor Neurone Disease (MND) campaigner Rob Burrow is right up there in all our minds.

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Somebody younger still, Molly Russell, who took her own life after watching horrors online at the age of 14 and who would now have been 21, is also so very worthy of a mention.

Farmers making hay in the late evening sunshine in the fields in Wensleydale near Bainbridge in 2022. PIC: Tony JohnsonFarmers making hay in the late evening sunshine in the fields in Wensleydale near Bainbridge in 2022. PIC: Tony Johnson
Farmers making hay in the late evening sunshine in the fields in Wensleydale near Bainbridge in 2022. PIC: Tony Johnson

We have taken, perhaps as part of that aforementioned midlife crisis, to turning the radio on first thing in the morning rather than the television. A much gentler way of waking up, rather than facing the bright studio lights and even brighter cosmetically enhanced smiles of the presenters.

On Monday morning, Molly’s father was speaking about how he will never see the Online Safety Act (which only hit the statute books towards the end of last year) him and other bereaved parents so tirelessly campaigned for as a “job done”. In the fast-changing world of technology he appealed to the next government to straight away commit to updating the legislation and to work harder to root out and bring to justice those preying on vulnerable youngsters. They are a modern-day plague.

Ian Russell has obviously not entered mid-life crisis territory as, unlike yours truly who would have a blanket ban on all youngsters owning mobile phones and instead issue them with stationery sets to write thank you letters and correspond with elderly aunts, he is so admirable in his approach that there is no point trying to turn the clock back. Instead, he has an unwavering commitment to holding the tech companies that fail to clamp down on vile posts to account.

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Away from this weekly missive the farming press is where this writer makes her daily bread. One project, to help spread the word about a brand-new wellbeing movement for farmers and crofters in Scotland called Farmstrong, can perhaps be pinpointed for the acknowledgement of this midlife crisis.

It follows a formula first founded in New Zealand, where there is a huge farming community and it became clear that while they would spend time and money on their livestock or machinery the average rural dweller would never think about investing time in themselves.

A simple motto about living well to be able to farm well, spread the message about the importance of looking after yourself so that when the bad times come - as they invariably do in farming - people are in better shape to cope.

Stories written have included a farmer’s wife, juggling farm work and an extra job to contribute to the holding in Orkney’s income, who now makes time to take an almost daily dip in the sea. She marched off to the farmhouse one day for her swimming costume after watching her grandchildren splashing around and seeing the look of pure joy on their faces and hasn’t looked back. Yes, she sometimes feels guilty when there are cattle to worm or sheep to move, but taking a little time for herself has had a really positive impact on the whole farm and family.

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Another lady farmer took up weightlifting completely by chance and found a whole new group of friends who might look a bit different - with their tanned torsos - but who are incidentally just as passionate about the benefits of drinking milk as her dairy farming family.

The men that have spoken about what keeps them ploughing on have been equally interesting; many with common themes of making sure they get off the farm every so often. Even if it’s just getting to the local livestock market for a ‘blether’ as they say north of the border.

Another symptom of mid-life crisis is shying away from social gatherings and this does ring true. Pottering about at home, deadheading the roses or talking to the terriers, often providing more than enough entertainment.

However, some events such as this week’s Bramham Horse Trials are always looked forward to.

Even more so this year, as - just within the last fortnight or so - this mid-life crisis sufferer is back riding after an absence of many years.

Keeping kicking on is important.

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