World's 'worst' record cover collection revealed in Yorkshire exhibition - from the bizarre to the curiously outrageous

Huddersfield father-of-two Steve Goldman has amassed a haul of what he believes to be the worst 300 album covers ever made.

What began with a charity shop find is now to result in a public vote, as he opens an exhibition to determine the most unintentionally ridiculous.

One features a couple frollicking in cabbage, another a guitarist wearing only tall socks. Some see disembodied heads, or jesters with a carrot for a nose.

“This guy’s head is growing out of a plank of wood,” said Mr Goldman, as he considered a 1970s’ cover from the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra.

Of another, he added: “These singers are covered in cabbage; in fact they are kissing with cabbage. And why is this person naked to his knees? It’s just comical really.”

Lady Gaga’s Born This Way makes the cut for the final 200 in the exhibition that opens today, as her body merges with a motorcycle for its album cover. So too, controversially, does the Rolling Stones’ cover for Dirty Work, with the gritty rock gods pictured in garish electric fashion.

“It’s just so bad, if you know the Rolling Stones, to see them in this 1980s’ garb,” insisted Mr Goldman. Now, with the exhibition, he brings them together for a vote.

“It’s something that needs to be done,” he said. “I’m surprised it hasn’t happened before.”

Collection

Mr Goldman, a computer programmer, runs the website mapfodder.com where he has charted obscurity in many forms. As a boy he had been pictured under a street sign for Stephen Road, so he later set out to visit all 100 such signs over a series of weekends.

He contributes to a society collecting ‘boring grid squares’ on Ordnance Survey maps, detailing distance markers that hold the fewest distinguishing features. He has also collated some of the strangest road names in Britain; it took a year to trawl data files for all 700,000.

His interest in bad covers dates back 30 years to an album called Peter Rabbit, featuring rabbits from a hat with superimposed faces. He snapped it up for 50p.

“I only bought it because of the cover,” he said. “I’ve been looking for it again ever since.”

'Bad covers'

Five years ago he discovered online marketplaces as a treasure trove for “obscure” LPs, including the album he had long been searching for - and so much more.

“I told my kids I was going to start collecting bad album covers, now they’re all contribute,” he laughed. “It’s not a bad hobby.”

He now has close to 300 covers, only ordering those deemed “sufficiently bad”. Of the strict criteria he uses, he said: “There are plenty of bad album covers around, but those that are sexist or racist or homophobic don’t feature, it’s just gore and violence.

“My criteria is that it’s got to have a context which has gone horribly wrong, it’s not enough just to have a band in bad clothing. Crucially, it must be unintentionally funny.”

Charity vote

Mr Goldman, aged 55, suffered a stroke just over a year ago, with the exhibition until November 14 to raise funds for the Different Strokes charity that supported him.

Under Huddersfield Council’s temporary contemporary programme, it will be held at Unit 16 of the Piazza Centre, transforming empty lets into art spaces.

There will be opportunity to browse the album covers, to a soundtrack from each LP, before voting in a ballot box to determine the ultimate winner.

“It will be interesting to find out what the worst record cover in the world actually is,” he said. “I’m still deciding my vote.”

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