How ‘relaxed’ double Commonwealth Games squash gold medallist James Willstrop finally learned to just enjoy the game

“I was so serious and intense about everything,” says the 38-year-old of his 26-year-old self, a man obsessed with squash and the pursuit of perfection.

Intensity drips out of every page of ‘Shot and a Ghost’, published in London Olympic year about Willstrop’s 2010 season on the professional tour.

Every match, every training session, every meal was all geared to one thing – winning. When he didn’t win, the despair consumed him.

A decade on Willstrop is still winning on a squash court, but as he showed in claiming a gold medal in the men’s doubles at the Commonwealth Games in Birmingham on Monday, he does so now in a far happier place.

“I was a very different person back then,” he acknowledges. “I’ve managed to recognise that it was not a healthy way to be.

“If I was going to read the book now I’d be like I can’t believe how much I’ve changed. In the end it’s just a game, I’ve learned perspective over the last 10 years.

“I had hip surgery, so my career was threatened. I’ve had children and that is the ultimate perspective. Then you get older and more experienced and it’s like what was I thinking back then?

“And I think that’s why I’m still playing because I’ve found a way to realise I’m lucky to be a squash player, so just enjoy it for goodness sake, stop getting so stressed.

“So I’m not stressing about being world No 1 any more. I still work hard, I love working hard, but I love playing squash and that’s conducive to winning.

“Whereas before I was trying too hard and I wasn’t winning because there was far too much imbalance and intensity in my mental state.”

By the age of 34, Willstop – who first reached world No 1 in 2012 – did win the most high-profile prize in his sport when he claimed the singles gold medal at the 2018 Commonwealth Games on the Gold Coast.

“If you’d have said back then you’d not only play in the next one you’ll win another gold medal, I’d have just laughed at you,” says Willstrop of his run to doubles gold in Birmingham.

But the Covid pandemic helped prolong his career.

“It gave me a bit of rest time, a time to stop,” says Willstrop, who together with partner Vanessa Atkinson – herself a former squash professional – and their two children, found ways to make training fun again.

“That was valuable, it gave me chance to let my body stop bashing around on a squash court. Suddenly we were doing home workouts, PE sessions with the kids, having to figure out different ways of training. It was fun and totally relaxed. It was active rest and it does wonders for the mind.

“Coming out of lockdown we had a Commonwealth Games in our home country coming up and I couldn’t let that opportunity go.”

Life off the squash court has also helped keep Pontefract’s Willstrop at the top of his game. In his spare time he is an actor, working on amateur productions as varied as the Addams Family in Harrogate in March, the Sound of Music in York this autumn, and for his first paid acting job before the Commonwealth Games, the story of a squash player set on a squash court.

“I love it,” he says. “It’s a hobby but it really helps my squash, because we all need relaxation. Rehearsing, getting away from the squash court a couple of nights a week and doing stuff with other people is a great tonic.

“There’s so many similarities; the performing aspect, the adrenalin I get through squash, I’m seeking that from the acting a bit really.”

Which brings us on to the question he was asked after almost every game in Birmingham – were the Commonwealth Games his final act in squash?

“I feel like my squash brain is strong and getting stronger as I get older, so I don’t want to let it go too easily,” he says.

“If my body holds up – and I’ve got an incredible physio working in Leeds called Alison Rose, who I wouldn’t have made it this far without – I might be able to keep going for a bit.

“I will take a break to see how the body reacts to the Commonwealth Games but I don’t feel the pressure of putting a date on it. One day I’ll know and I’ll stop.”

What a chapter that would be.